Charged.

Normally I don't use the blog to complain.  But there are some things in life that you can't ignore anymore.  This is one of those times!

Let me introduce myself.  I go by several names...Mom, Colleen and most recently "Don't touch me!".  You see, I've become the primary source of static electricity in our home.  I've got more electric charge than all of our phones and laptops combined.  I shock everyone and everything.  The dogs won't come near me, not that I can blame them.  If I set my laptop on my lap, it's like constant fireworks.  Little discharges of electricity, at a rate of a dozen or so a minute.  On a good day (or a bad, however you look at it!), the little blue bursts of energy can be seen across the room at least once an hour. 

That's it, that's my complaint.  We've already tried every room humidifier under the sun, installed a "whole house" humidifier to the furnace, taken stock out in Static Guard.  You name it, we've tried it!  In an effort to avoid complaining and screaming in pain, I have devised the following plan. Shave the dogs, shave my head, go barefoot, sell all microfiber furniture, live in the bathtub or skip all of the above and move to a warm, high humidity area. 

Aloha!